If you could choose to be a master (or mistress) of any skill in the world, which skill would you pick?
As soon as I read this question, I knew exactly what skill I would want to be a master at.
I know that is a really boring answer, but it would be awesome if normal talking just came easy to me like it does to most people. I know how to talk, I know English, and I don’t have any physical issues that prevent my mouth from working, but I just can’t “talk” to people very well. I’ve always been shy…really shy. When I was in elementary school I would cry if the teacher called on me to say an answer or talk in front of the class. What a loser! My kindergarten teacher thought something was wrong with me! Throughout school I got a little better about talking to people and no longer cried when I had to answer a question (even though my face and chest immediately turned beet red and my heart would start beating out of my chest if I was asked a question in front of a group of people)! I had a few close friends and didn’t talk to many other people. The boyfriends that broke up with me did so because “we just weren’t working out”, which was just an excuse for “you never talk and you’re boring so I’m moving on”.
I’m sure a lot of people throughout my life have thought that I’m conceited or snobby because I don’t go out of my way to talk to people. I don’t participate in group activities because the stress of forcing myself to interact with new people is just not worth it to me! I just don’t know how to make small talk. I remember when my husband and I were in high school and were just getting to know each other we would sit on the phone in silence. Back then we were both quiet…I still am, I don’t know what happened to him because he never shuts up now 🙂 I used to write down lists of topics to talk about while on the phone with him…I even wish I could do that as an adult in certain situations but that would surely make me look really odd.
I think I put too much pressure on myself and it just stresses me out – if I’m talking to someone my brain is going 100mph trying to think of the next question to ask. Then I think the question is stupid and then my mind goes blank and then comes the silence. This is why mastering the skill of the simple act of talking to people would have made parts of my life so much easier. I really am an interesting person and am quite fun once you get to know me – I just have trouble getting people to stick around until I let my guard down. Ugh, it’s so frustrating. It’s one of the reasons why I started this blog, so that I could write what’s on my mind and hopefully that will help me “speak” what’s on my mind.
Even though those people that talk non-stop are sometimes annoying, I’ve always secretly envied them. How in the world do they come up with stuff to talk about? What is going through their brains when they are talking like that? Are you talkative? If so, give me some tips! I’m a great listener!